London 💔

I’m writing this blog on the train from Stafford to London Euston after spending a weekend with my lovely friend from Uni where we have had the biggest catch up and put the worlds to right. We sat in the pub with a pitcher each and we were putting the world to rights. We spoke about the recent Manchester attack and we spoke about how we felt it wasn’t the end of attacks and that there would be another one soon. 
My friend popped to the ladies and I was just scrolling up and down my news feed and then had a quick glance at the news. I felt sick. Reports were coming in about a van that had driven into a crowd of people on the bridge. Another terror attack. I had to try and stop myself from worrying because it may be an accident I thought? But then the questions were setting in? Why would it make breaking news, why would the van be travelling 50mph and why aren’t we having updates saying everything was okay? 
My friend got back from the bathroom and we tried to relax and just carry on talking but we both knew we wanted to go back home, feel safe and watch the news for regular updates. That’s exactly what I did and I will never forget that night. I’ll never forget that night because when you watch armed police screaming at pedestrians to ‘get back’ and to ‘Go home’ and to ‘RUN’… You know that something bad is happening. As the reports were developing, the fear was growing. 
My friends were out in London, my other half works in the week in London, we live 30 mins train from central London and for the first time, I didn’t feel safe. I was in Birmingham which is miles away from Manchester and London but what I mean is, I didn’t feel safe to live in the UK. I think watching it live and seeing the fear on people’s faces and see just how severe the attack was made it all sink in- we really are at war. 
Today, I’m angry. The fear has calmed a little but I’m just so angry that people can be so evil and bring so much chaos and heartbreak to our country and for what? Because we have a democracy? Because we have rights for all genders? Because we want peace and to help each other? Positive aspects of living in the western world yet because it doesn’t fit in with their sick ideology- they feel the need to murder innocent people. It makes me feel physically sick. 
You can’t stop it from living your daily life however I’m not ashamed to say that from last nights events, I am fearful. Once this train hits London Euston, I have to jump on a tube and I’m fearful. That’s so wrong. I’m pretty confident I’ll be fine, in fact I’m 99% I will be but its that feeling of not knowing when the next attack could happen or whether it could be you caught up in it next. 
I’m so proud of our country’s emergency services. They killed those three men in 8 minutes. It was eight minutes of terror and it was eight minutes that caused the loss of many lives and eight minutes that will change many people’s lives for the worse. Yet, in those eight minutes, our emergency services were able to respond to the call, mentally and physically prepare themselves and not only take out the terrorists but protect and save as many people as possible during this. I so so proud to have them serve our country and I respect them so much as I know it’s something I wouldn’t be able to do. 
I hope you’re all okay and haven’t been affected by the attacks. What has our world come to? Take care everyone. 
All scribbled out ❤️

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